perhaps... shisan 1. Wolfram Triumphant Is it not fiction To think Especially hooey such as this I should calm, keep myself strong I've never known a cry to last so long Easy to cry in the narcosis dream I fought the battle no one can win Now she's gone, she had to displace The scar she cut into a special place The spirits roam free and low some more tender I'd never surrender for she's tender for ever [high] And she was one of my only kind [back to normal] So lonely kind, 'most no one but my mind She fought the battle no one can win Fall again, see enemy within Damn. She was younger than me now A decade Can't but imagine I should never reach twenty-eighth I consider that a modest de-achievement If I do The goal of a different earthian art to reach another mu When Adolf attacks Hell and Winston comes I take envy on those who no more live aeons But I'm just a fur with throwing stars And specially-placed feline-made scars She went on without the guns of Sakai I'd rather take guns when I'm about to die Prettier is moonlight reflecting on still water But a shorter agony worth the peace would've comfort her [high] O the grooves of blood so kind [back to normal] The kind of form that could have cut my mind We'd reach each other in our compulsion To fight the battle no one could have won To answer my own unmarked question: Without effort it might well be So the rest is fact [angvst05] "O Raven days, dark Raven days of sorrow, Will ever any warm light come again? Will ever the lit mountains of To-morrow Begin to gleam athwart the mournful plain?" - Sidney Lanier (1842-1881) [note. the structure of the "I should calm..."-kind paragraphs are completely (yet writhen) based on somesong by someone called mr. mclellan. and so is proven, da vulpine bee!] ---- 2. A Dream Featuring Almost Willow lying down with a willowlike girl i can't but ask her "can you do the telekinesis trick?" and she says like whaath? but she's a willowlike girl and she should know the drill she already has someone but we're almost holding hands sleepy are we, that must be it awkward the wiccan rede for we're almost hugging well-nigh asleep together i don't believe in any enishi yet it's definitely something... too woolgathering (hate the word magickal) we have here like she had outdone the mental gravity i'm not sure is it only dream but i think we're embracing right now i even imagine whispering that inept i love thee stuff though i know she's not mine and this is probably mostly a dream but dream can be much like willowlike witchcraft things enough to get softtouched by stupid love [avgst05] ---- 3. Stormydrawings... (big happy fuck you!) "Hfakk you both. I'm gonna shoot you ride 'tween you green, watery eyes, scam wolf. And your lover's gonna see you fur totally drenched in your own blood." It was cold that dawn like a dawn often is Lucy brought the light and Zephyr blew the breeze Breath was fume and vapour and fur was hoarfrost And happened the thing I've feared the most There was this canine, ill-fated and sick With lotsa grudge and damn good in it A nemesis he played, a pendragon of the past Mongering wars that would nothing but last Ashamed to confess; we even kiss'd once An erstwhile tiny moment with no romance A vulpine of wrong sex was what I did see Mentally ill almost as severely (as me) What disturbed momentum did carry him this far Can't be as frantic as I went for the jugular His psyche high as cellar but stellar to him Same here, pal, and I didn't care did I really win So I showed him no Percy perversus us all But this I did to make his black heaven fall I called her, my lover from hiding behind To present our devotee crimes of furkind " Wield the water, use it as I've shown Spray it like poison to make them drown Fetch the fire, drench and spread it like surge Dainty rumble, crackling for a burning church Catch the paint, splatter with it like mad . Like murder as the only thing you ever had (Even better could you paint an anthro cat) Yeah. Paint. Beyond blood that should be rained Really... Kitty sarc-osmic, scotch-colour, scented even Erratically, erotically eraded, down-driven . Breakwatered and frenzied, 1 cute diabolic source Eves with a cat like that all cutthroat intercourse Thusly... My lover has seen that many times before, fox. You can kill us, you can rape us, but you can't shock us ... that way " .... ... . .. [dez 999 --> disgust of 1005] [for additional notes, see the so-called credits at the rockbottom] ---- .. 4. Sweetyou (Sweet Arkham) . ..... .. .. ... ..... .. ....... . .. .. .. .... ... .......... . "And the crazy girl would sit up and play in my gore.. Making little matchstick kind of houses from the fragments of my skull... ........ . My lifeless, still body bleeding warm blood onto the freezing cinderblocks... Brain and bits squeegee-ing, smearing a path down the safety glass of that aquarium from hell..." . .. -jw/eg . . ... .... . . swweetgirl sweetgirl sweetgrilll like the voices i nted yoou (withme) curl .. girl . our eternity is but a tie-nee drop . lets twogether fallfrom the ve-ryy ee-rie top . noo she first ays butshe'salone and hurting and sweetsweet and hurting(heserlsf) so i can leaveherlivelikethis likehell! ic'teh ones with the syringe come and she gets hself to her frenzy "noonoo you will calm down or you'll get straitjacketed" "we'll inject [HTEPOISON [what i hear]] deep into your veins .. and then you'll obey again" she struggles and makes them get back but like always there are too many and they're all ready to grab then .. isnt it so beautiful when a white anthrofox surrenders surrenders . stands staring at her toes (hair covering most of her face) sadly . sadly back against the cold white concrete wall relinquishment . i can hear that tinysweetvoice sayin " i surrender.." spreads her arms to let everything HIT and no more cares what happens toher delicateyounggbody an' i just love her for that . . then i say ( in her mind) . i dont hurt you, i only ask to . (escape with me) .. . (pleass...ee.. .. ) an d o mean it . true-ly... . . . . . . . ... . [avgust'05] .. ---- . 5. Fuck Love . . . The post-teen take air, fallen from craze Too many old runes of the youth in ruins Why fall for those who relish the haze . Still are ones with two hundred moons . That is the prime and primal thing to me 'tleast for all who don't tire in "why?", the inmost holy and the blessed-wanna-be, who'd sure make the young infinite woods cry And I'd gladly get pass'd past a cemetarium Like never seen and always been there . Bypassing transgressing without a monumentum To let the other freaks enjoy the glare Noonetheless, the house wine talk or not The empty cenotaph mine I would fain share A girl with a wee bit too short time pre-rot Tangible body, enough! Its the wildness of the heart For more than I'd fuck my love, I'd fucking love to care [september'05] ---- 6. The Cask-strengthened Charcoal Wolf The Castle walls of granite keep the darkness inside the air dusted with casket-strength old scent . and the wolf with shining eyes and so well so right benight that captivated heart for this is what I meant! You Wolf Beauty, please hold my fusain and scratch that much I craved that I saved this for Thee chafe that foxford-greyness to make me perfect match with you ... with you... but could I ever be but Me (Which Ist Exactly whence cummmms this lovely coal through all de-loveled wood coal winter dreams yeth pleese don't overstand this wrong false or foul not obsessing, merely curious (withever that means)) Sothe Dust-scented old walls that keep us inside us and birch beer (very dark) and some charcoal.... teh wolf with 'ckedly-coloured RFIUARH! to hide us both from the gashy lights , kept charred in-whole... By the grand plutonic pyrogenous igneous rock hoping I reach the ma-ai of her lvly fang soon she says to sich entleiben or something (whatteh fark?) I tell her that I don't speak no teutonic stuff (though I do) Out-o'the-love like an absolution and pity and woe she draws a sig sauer mosquito with caliber of .22 with "I know you're coldly pro-foundly kami, SO... do exactly as I say and I promise I'll kill you" I'll be Damned & led at gunpoint to some point and clutched inevitable is the recognition that her super acid eyes are the prettiest.. things... I've... ever..... touched!!! so much beauty... and that beauty clenching that glory device Mine turn to "oot sie vaan helvetin kaunis" obfuscate mess'd a little she blows the smoky lead debris fragrant clearly brooks and tells me to kiss the dust... "or else, mate..." or else she lets me live. gosh. she really does understand! She "jump, snow cat. take a leap of hate" begs with a heart-shaped nose leaving me to marvel to wonder of happenstance of coincidence for this is the wolf who draws for me (and her expletive is sweetly gross) and something mostly very sexy & comforting is included in the riddance I am not in love with you or should I say not yet I fear the future, present, too wir could not bounce toget Hrr . x [september'05] ---- 7. Come Share Your Hate With Me for as Frank Black once said, I am very lonely [sethtender'05] ---- 8. Uranium Rain (Perhaps In Death) Have a pint with actinide cuss urbock autumn drink Listen well, I've means to tell of infinite nothing.... There wert times, pervert of crimes we did not practise sleep Unconsciousness crept through caress that's sex and war for freaks All our dolours in autumncolours far ultra-violets Violence we let it drench For were we not adepts We met fiends and fantasies Our demons told us this Could you believe, yes, honestly the tiny end is a bliss They do worships apocalips yet our end is little! Ev'ry death how bloodily fed Her was toffy, brittle Death liked her with deathlike care that's uranium blood All life silver, quickly thrill'd her long gone half-lived heart (Her dead, heavy uranium heart) I dream of her like every night and everydawn I'd die This morning crave is true edge-play ins outside by side Mourners writers rapers saints and one eye in the middle I hate I paint but wawl's too faint and dour discolours twiddle Us mere cats and psychopaths Melt-downcast the rain And this time matters no crime Nothing saves the sane Philosophers, infernal cares with little to defend Perhaps in the vranium rain they'll comprehend... [september'05] ---- 9. Snow Falling on Panzers She was just a little girl When she first time held a knife Her first murder she committed When she was only five She was just a little girl When she first time rode a tank That's when she sexed, her leader watching as the teeth sank... She hated him she hated self With twelve nice stabs in a row This was nearly when fell the Flak Panzer Snow She was a ruin of a wolf cub Her life was rather quick Tasted the coltari poisons And sucked the dalatail milk The slumber beaut next to the war Slepth through the upcoming cold Solely slept when fell the Flak Panzer Snow She was asleep the most of her life And the hours spent awake a rash mix of having (mostly) a gun in her mouth and being at heart as young as six... So she took only the unawares when... She was only seven years When she did real deep with her knife Yeah, she was just a little girl When she first time tried to die [early autumn'05] ---- 10. I'm cool, shut the fuck up I know I should put lovefalling on rations Chartreuse eyes often cause some repercussions... YET there ARE lovely eyes I have KISSED with passions! Leaped on a strange side that may be my maunder (For absence makes the heart go yonder) YET in every occassion (but one), I'm back with blood-red thunder So lonely that it might make one die With elf-esteem long ago ran dry YET do I crawl and drool in mere self-pity? DO I? A nobody with no-prose yay as shit Almost noone's interested in any of my writ YET against all the shouldance I never enjoy the poetry firelit I may live alone the rest of my moan A heart of a furry far too hard to stone YET the sinz I'm about to commit are for HER (the red tigress) and her alone [october'05] ---- 11. Plutonium Fiction o. sprii (da preface) Near-bushi chess go malac's fresco Spirit-burning fight From gatesleepers keep. It deepens, Her_sword beside the night! i. pikivälke The grafite-slowened finite moment Small like running Lree Dark water lead yellow not red Klaproth discovery Uranium oxide makes her eyes yellowish green Plutonium her mind completely evil and mean Vulturators aren't we them, add hannyato for poison Blood of us, them, shall rush from horizon to horizon!! ii. valokitti I love her naked, cannot fake it Fluffy, sleek so pretty I'd nevah be with anydream Anyone but kitty... iii. puumahla (would you...) Mister E. Feist only_for the crazed This is and further more Story that we (the cat and me) Made, got very bored So who are you to read this through Some girl with_a crazy dream? If you are and got this far Come share your craze with me [october'05] ---- "It gives me an idea, though, of what it must be like for a person to go insane. It horrifies me." -mn 12. Dawn. the last one. *sigh* I write this now, 'cause the_end may come Too quickly to_test my strength in tongue And_I_always knew cometh a_sad en' stout of_the_ends despite my writhen suicide note x x x x x In fantasy I'd find a shed to camp & drink & take all med I'd wait for HER to_the_last of me I'd joy with_Abyssic Hate colourfully x x x x x \ _ _ _ Now honeyblood mocha and Hesse book Could_induce a mellower outlook As life grew too stressfullextreme Bokuto, but_less with proper viin x x x x So lets end it in prussic acid This end isn't of magic or tragic With azure-winged magpie, dragon Break me my acid, if just one Kraa... Hodie mihi, cras tibi.... [october'05] "Today he is there to trip you up, And he will torture you tomorrow. Yet he is also there to ease the pain, When you are lost in grief and sorrow" - Moredhel riddle ---- Perhaps in the Uranium Rain has been desperately molested by Wolfram Winterfuhr. Damage done at the 29th dawn of the moon called the october moon of the 1005th yearn, after 2 & a half ^ of those of being a fall guy of that stupid stupid STUpid stupsdi(love). Some title lines stolen (& some wriggled) from Stormy. So thank you for the inspiration. And im sorry that i quoted someone in "sweet arkham". She wrote prettily. The song isnt about her, though. If about anybody. Im sorry. I feel like shit. Concerning char coal wolf: the story tells that neither one of us fell. and yet "Vær en varulv, en blodtørstig ulv forkledd som menneske, for det er kun når du lykkes å skjule ditt sanne jegs ansikt for dine fiender at du kan jakte fritt blant dem." (Satanic aphorism) Tristitia once was a sin Though not this far far north Still I'd joy your gloomy grin Northern wolf girl - come forth... Who ever might you have been